


let me go

by rroranicus



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-31
Updated: 2014-08-31
Packaged: 2018-02-15 13:59:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2231664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rroranicus/pseuds/rroranicus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gavin loved Michael. Michael loved Lindsay. Unable to bear the sadness from his one-sided love, Gavin moved to London and has never been happier, especially with his new boyfriend, Ryan. However, when both Ryan and Gavin go to Austin to attend the party of Geoff, Gavin’s guardian, Michael arrives and admits to Gavin that things have not been the same without him and things go downhill from there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. i.

**Author's Note:**

> My first rooster teeth fic!! woo!! plus it's a big bang wow. The art isn't here yet, but once we have it i'll definitely post it then! yay

Despite everything, Gavin will always remember that he met Michael first.

 It wasn’t a glorious first meeting, in which they were in a room full of strangers and Michael lit up the room. No, it was quite the opposite actually. Gavin, just moving in from Britain, was late. On his first day of school.

Bollocks.

Gavin willed himself to run as fast as his legs could take, gripping his bag as he saw the school from afar. 20 more minutes.

He cursed himself for staying up all night to play video games with his guardian, Geoff. Sometimes he was a bad influence to him, but he didn’t mind. It was actually pretty awesome.

 15 more minutes.

“Shit.” Gavin whispered, looking at his watch as he continued to run.

He hoped the teacher wouldn’t embarrass him for being late or something. Or maybe that the teacher just wasn’t there. Anything at all, really. He didn’t want to make such a shit impression on the first day. Not that he cared, he just didn’t want to stand out.

 10 more minutes. 

At this point, Gavin didn’t notice anything. Too focused on going to school on time, he failed to recognize the bicycle that was heading straight for him.

"Move, you fuck!” Gavin turned around and saw the bicycle swerve with difficulty just to get passed him. “Goddamnit I could’ve died!” The man on the bicycle swore, his auburn hair made him look like he was burning with anger.

"Oh, bugger off. You’re fine!” was all Gavin said as he continued to run.

“Hey wait a minute!” This time Gavin didn’t turn around. He didn’t want to be late, not because of that asshole.

He wasn’t late, in the end. But he did have such a bad start to the first day, which made him feel like crap.  Stupid boy with auburn hair. Stupid bicycle. Stupid Austin.  The teacher came in not too long after Gavin entered.

“Hello!” The teacher greeted with glee. “I am Mr. Burns and I will be your homeroom for this year.” He grinned. “All of you probably know each other by now, but we have a new addition to our class. Please come forward, Mr. Free.” Mr. Burns was staring right at him, which made Gavin gulp. Gavin nodded, standing up from his seat and advancing to the front.

“Hello everyone.” Gavin gave a sheepish smile. “My name is Gavin and—“

The door burst open

 “I AM NOT LATE, MR. BURNS. I SWEAR. SOME STUPID DUDE WAS OUTSIDE WALKING AND—” A boy was at the door, sweating and breathing heavily.

 It was the auburn-haired boy.

This day couldn’t get any worse.

 The auburn boy must’ve recognized him too, because he stopped the moment he saw Gavin and just glared.

“Glad you decided to join us, Michael!” Mr. Burns said, obviously not deterred by the sudden intrusion. “Go sit down on your seat.” Michael didn’t move for a moment, as he continued to glare at Gavin, who was now looking at the floor.

 “Yes, sir.” Michael said, softer than earlier and less angry. He maneuvered himself across the room to his chair.

His chair that was seated behind Gavin.

 Fuck.

 ---

It was horrible having a person who hates you to no end sit behind you. Michael did a lot of things to Gavin that he got away with, like throwing spitballs at his hair or sticking gum in it in all.

It was a nightmare to Gavin.

 He had tried to talk to Mr. Burns about it, but Michael always seemed to be around during those times so it never happened.  He noticed Michael always smirked at him and it irritated Gavin to no end. He should sit down, have a nice chat with Michael, and maybe punch him in the jaw for being such a dickhead. And maybe a kick in his shin would be top too.

 That sounded nice.

 He felt a spitball hit the back of his head once more. He cursed silently and looked behind him, seeing a happy Michael snickering away. He glared at Michael as if doing so would kill him.

 “Mr. Free, please face forward.” Mr. Sorola said suddenly, which made Gavin sit up and fact front again. “Unless you and Mr. Jones can share what your conversation to the class?” Mr. Sorola suggested as everyone stared at him. With a sigh, he crossed his arms in defeat and silently replied “No, sir.” Mr. Sorola nodded and continued on with the lesson.

Gavin swore he heard Michael snickering even louder then.

I guess all Gavin could do was ignore Michael until graduation.

Fate had other ideas, however.

 ---

“I need you all to have a dialogue using any of Shakespeare’s works.” Mr. Burns announced to the class. “Dialogue needs two people, which means only one thing.” The class began to murmur.  “You must have a partner in order to pass this task. If you come here on your own, that’s a monologue and I can’t take that.” He smirked. “Think of it as an ice-breaker for the class! I know some of you aren’t close with your other classmates,” He was staring at Gavin for some odd reason. “So, I suggest you start on that now.” The bell rang as if on cue. “Class dismissed!” 

The class stood up immediately, all of them talking to each other and partnering up. Gavin clutched his bag tighter. He’d just wait it out and see who didn’t have a partner.

“Hey, Ray,” He heard Michael from behind. “Wanna be partners?”

 “Sorry dude.” Ray whispered back. “Kerry already asked me.” 

“What the fuck?” Michael said. “Mr. Burns just announced it, how—“

 “Sorry man.” Ray said, genuine guilt evident in his voice. “See ya.” Michael groaned loudly as Gavin slowly looked over his shoulder. Michael noticed though, and Gavin stiffened and stood up, storming out of the room.

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

 He was so fucked. Michael had a knack of letting out his frustrations through Gavin by pushing him to the wall or bumping into him rather harshly. And Gavin didn’t really want that right now.

“Gavin!” 

Shit.

Gavin walked a bit faster, trying his best to outrun the other male.  But of course Michael somehow had some secret stamina and managed to grab Gavin’s arm. Gavin stared at Michael, wide-eyed and blinked like an owl. It appeared Michael also had no idea what to say once he grabbed Gavin though, as he just stared back.

“What?” Gavin said, softly. He looked down at the floor, which also made Michael realize that he was staring.

“I just uh…” Michael stuttered. “I just wondered if you wanted to be partners for the task.” Gavin’s head shot up, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“What?” Gavin repeated.

“What? What?” Michael mocked him and Gavin rolled his eyes. “Look, I only need to do this task because I need to ace it so don’t think anything else of it.” Michael warned him and Gavin just blinked for a moment before nodding slowly. “Good.” Michael let go of Gavin’s arm, which he didn’t realize he was still holding as he walked the other direction.

Sometimes Gavin wished he’d just say no.

 ---

Michael’s house was different from Gavin’s. Since Gavin was just staying with the Ramsey's for the mean time, he didn’t have that much space. Michael, however, was the exact opposite. His house wasn’t like a mansion, but it was quite big for a boy whose family stays out at night for work.

“My room’s up here.” Michael motioned to the staircase and headed upwards, with Gavin trailing behind. Gavin inspected the pictures, all with Michael and his family. It felt cozy and homey and Gavin felt as if he was intruding on such an intimate ambiance.

“Come on in.” Michael said, as he headed to a door that had “Mogar’s Room” written on the front.

“Mogar?” Gavin asked.

“Just a nickname my dad gave me when I was a kid.” If Gavin noticed that Michael was blushing, he didn’t say anything.

If the living room was already quite intimate, Michael’s room was even more so. It had photos of Michael’s graduation, his awards and achievements. The only thing that caught Gavin’s eye, however, was the television, which just so happened to be connected to an Xbox.

“I didn’t know you play.” Gavin said, pointing to the console.

“Are you kidding me?” Michael said “I play every fucking day! Why? You too?” Michael blinked as Gavin beamed at him.

“Fuck yeah!” Gavin looked at the shelf next to the television, eyeing all the games he had. “Do you have Halo?” He noticed the box of Halo and opened it, only to find it empty. Gavin frowned.

“It’s already in the fucking Xbox, dumbass.” Michael smiled, chuckling a bit at Gavin’s stupidity. Gavin smiled sheepishly. “Do you uh… Wanna play?” Gavin’s smile might’ve brightened the whole room.

“Sure!”

And that was how Michael and Gavin ended up playing Halo the whole time rather than talking about the dialogue. Sure, Gavin was worried about his grade but he didn’t feel all that bad as Michael actually smiled at him and waved him goodbye once they were over.

“Tomorrow again?” Michael suggested, smiling sheepishly. “This time, we actually fucking talk about the thing.” He put out a hand, waiting for Gavin to shake it. Gavin chuckled a bit before holding it tightly in his grasp and shaking it with determination.

“Of course.”

With that, he grabbed his things, waved back at Michael once more and walked back home.

If he felt butterflies in his stomach, he never said anything about it. 

\---

“Brilliant performance, Brandon and Chris!” Mr. Burns clapped enthusiastically as Brandon and Chris theatrically bowed at his classmates. “Wonderful portrayal of  Bassanio and Antonio. Absolutely lovely!” Brandon and Chris began to walk to their seats. “Yes, well, next in line is… Michael and Gavin!”

Gavin looked behind his shoulder and saw Michael staring back. Both nodding as if saying “let’s fucking do this”. They both stood up, walking to the front of the class.

“All right,” Mr. Burns began. “Please tell what play this is, who you are and the current event.”

“Well, this is from the play Romeo and Juliet.” Mr. Burns raised an eyebrow at Gavin’s explanation. “But we’re not playing them, I swear!” This made the class laugh and got him a punch in the arm from Michael. “Sorry.” Gavin cleared his throat. “Michael plays Tybalt and I play Mercutio. We’re gonna play their fight scene.” Mr. Burns nodded and gestured them to start. Both Gavin and Michael took a deep breath and faced each other.

 Gavin opened his mouth first.

_“O calm, dishonourable, vile submission!  
_ _Alla stoccata carries it away.”_

 Gavin drew out a wooden sword from his side, which earned him a few snickers from the class.

_“Tybalt, you rat-catcher, will you walk?”_

 Michael smiled smugly at the other male.

_“What wouldst thou have with me?”_ Michael said, staring down at Gavin.

_"_ _Good king of cats, nothing but one of your nine  
_ _lives; that I mean to make bold withal, and as you  
_ _shall use me hereafter, drybeat the rest of the  
_ _eight. Will you pluck your sword out of his pitcher  
_ _by the ears? make haste, lest mine be about your  
_ _ears ere it be out.”_ Gavin said, raising his sword higher and aiming at Michael’s face, which made Michael inhale deeply, as if intimidated.

_“I am for you.”_   Was all Michael said before he, too, brought out his sword and began a duel with Gavin. At first it started with simple hits of the sword, before Gavin swooped down and tried to aim for Michael’s feet, but somehow missed and landed on his butt, which allowed Michael access to stab him. With the wooden sword of course. 

Gavin wailed in pain.

_“I am hurt.  
_ _A plague o' both your houses! I am sped.  
_ _Is he gone, and hath nothing?”_ Gavin hung his head mournfully and closed his eyes for the drama before he fell flat on the floor and imitated a dead person before they finished their dialogue.

 For a moment there was silence. Gavin began worrying that they somehow did their dialogue wrong. He cracked one of his eyes open to survey the room and then the room erupted into claps.

 “That was awesome!!” One had said 

“Why didn’t we do a fight scene?”

“AGAIN!”

 Gavin sat up, grinning from ear to ear because of the outcome of their play. A hand suddenly appeared in front of his face, looking up he saw Michael reaching out a hand for him.

“Need help?” Michael was smiling almost as wide as Gavin and once again he felt butterflies in his stomach. At a loss of word, Gavin merely grabbed Michael’s hand and was pulled up. Michael even placed is arm around Gavin’s shoulder as even Mr. Burns clapped.

 “Amazing, boys! Just amazing!” He said. “You both get A’s for this task! Wonderful!” Gavin nodded at Mr. Burns as thanks as he and Michael walked back to their respectful seats, not before earning another punch on the arms from Michael.

Sometimes Gavin wished they hadn’t aced it.

\---

It was a few months into the semester when they met Lindsay.

 Lindsay was seated in their usual table and Michael was obviously pissed at the sudden appearance.

“Hey, shit face.” Michael said at the red headed girl. “That’s our table.”

She glanced at the table before looking back at Michael. “I don’t see the big deal.” She shrugged. “And I don’t see your names on it either.”

“Yeah well,” Michael said, “We don’t need to put our fucking names in order for it to be our fucking table.”

 “I don’t see how we can’t share it.” Lindsay began to eat her sandwich with no problem.

“Michael,” Gavin tugged on Michael’s sleeve. “Let’s just get another table—“

 “We’re not gonna get another table.” Michael harshly whispered. He looked back at the girl. “You’re not gonna leave?” Lindsay shook her head. “Yeah well, two can play at that game.” Michael sat down, across Lindsay, whose corners of her lips were slightly raised. Gavin sat down next to him.

 “I’m Lindsay.” She said.

“I never fucking asked.” Lindsay shrugged.

 “Just wanted to say that.”

There was a pause.

 “I’m Michael. This is Gavin.” He motioned at Gavin, who gave a small wave. Lindsay smiled.

 Gavin sometimes wished that Michael and him hadn’t sat there.

 ---

“Hey Michael, did you hear about the new film about zombies? Sounds pretty awesome! Let’s go watch it!” Gavin turned around as he began to fix his things into his bag.

“Sounds awesome!”  Michael said. “I heard such cool things about it like how some of the stunts were done by the actor himself and all—“

 “You guys gonna watch the new zombie movie?” Lindsay suddenly appeared next to them, books in her hand as she smiled with excitement. Michael blinked at the sudden appearance as Gavin smiled.

“Yeah.” Gavin said. “Why? You wanna come with us?” Gavin suggested, thinking nothing bad of it and only wanting to make more friends.

 “Sure!” Lindsay was practically jumping in her spot, rushing to her chair from across the room. “Let me just get my stuff ready.”

 “What do you think you’re doing, dude?” Michael whispered.

 “What?” Gavin said, looking at Michael strangely. “I don’t see the problem in bringing her.”

 “She’s gonna ruin the whole thing! It’s a zombie film! She’s probably gonna puke midway or something.” Michael frowned and Gavin chuckled.

“I think she has a stronger stomach than both of us combined, Michael.” Gavin said. “Besides, she seemed pretty glad to be watching it. I heard her talking about it earlier and she seemed really excited.” Michael grumbled, obviously not pleased but he didn’t say no.

 “Let’s go?” Lindsay smiled as Gavin nodded and headed for the theatre.

 ---

In the end Michael was the one who puked midway

Lindsay stroked his back as he vomited into a garbage can nearby.

 “Told you so, Michael.” Gavin said, chuckling as Michael only put up his middle finger to the other brit, causing him to chuckle even more. 

“Shush, shush, Michael.” Lindsay cooed as Michael continued to hurl.

“This sucks.” Michael said, wiping the residue from his mouth. “Who even makes such crappy movies like that! I mean, I don’t even know why I puked ugh.”

“Well aren’t you a sore loser.” Lindsay chuckled. “Come on, let’s go home. Where do you live?” Lindsay asked and Michael only pointed down the street. “Good! I was gonna go that way too.” He placed Michael’s arm around her shoulder and began to carry him.

“I puked, I’m not fucking drunk or anything. Geez.” Michael pushed himself away from Lindsay and began to walk.

“Michael!” Lindsay frowned. “We’ll see you on Monday, Gavin. Bye!” She waved at Gavin as she caught up with Michael. Gavin only waved weakly, saddened by the fact that Lindsay brought him home when it was his thing with Michael that he’d do some crazy shit and Gavin would be the one to take it home.

 He shrugged, guessing that a change might’ve been good.

 And how wrong he was.

\---

Gavin wasn’t a man of many words. He was a man of action, always moving just to get his point across. He never liked talking about his feelings or just talking in general. It was a difficult task for him to do so. Sometimes, he thinks that it’s his special super power.

Other times, he thinks it’s one of the worst things about him.

 Especially since he doesn’t know how to tell the boy he likes how much he adores him, and can only portray it through actions of being his best friend like walking him to class or listening to his stories and all. Usually, these little things don’t hurt as much. But that was before.

 It was different now.

“She’s so beautiful!” Michael wailed, as if it was the end of the world.

Michael and Gavin were on Gavin’s rooftop, sitting on fold-up chairs with beers in their hands as they stared at the stars. It was a beautiful night, the stars weren’t glistening that bright because of the lights around the city, but it was still special to them. But not as special as Michael, Gavin thought.

 “She’s so special, and so amazing and guuuh” Michael began to slur as he tilted to the side a bit. Gavin bit his lower lip, trying not to say anything that would ruin their conversation.

 “Really? Why?” It was official. Gavin Free was the most idiotic boy of the world.

“Her hair is so red like roses and her eyes are so blue like the sky and her name? Lindsay? Absolutely beautiful!” Michael was talking like one of the characters that Gavin’s mom watches every afternoon. It was kind of funny.

“I didn’t know you were such a poet, Michael.” Gavin giggled, sipping his beer while at the same time wondering if he would be like that about Michael too.

 

“That’s the thing, maaaaan.” Michael said. “She brings the poet out of me!” Michael placed his hand upon his heart and bowed his head, making his glasses fall down to the bottom of his nose and above his lip. “Shit.” Gavin giggled once more, earning him a glare from Michael.

“Sorry, Michael.” Gavin apologized, giving off a sheepish smile as Michael continued to glare. After a few more moments however, Michael began to grin as well which made the pair laugh.

 It became silent after that. Not the kind of awkward silence like when you bring home your boyfriend or girlfriend for your parents to meet. The kind of silence that makes you lean on the people next to you and just smile in understanding. The good kind of silence.  Gavin didn’t want it to end. Just Michael and him, staring up into the sky with their bottles in hand and just smiling like the tonight will be forever. However, Gavin himself knows this isn’t true. This isn’t his story.

 “I’m leaving for England tomorrow.”

 Michael stiffens and slowly turns to face Gavin, who is looking down at his bottle because he knows he can’t handle seeing the look on Michael’s face.

 “W-What?” Michael stutters. He rarely stutters.

 "I’m going back to England.” Gavin repeats, yet Michael still looks at him like he’s telling a joke.

“Are you telling me a joke?” Michael asks, as if reading Gavin’s mind. It takes a few moments for Gavin to respond because he wishes that he was joking, but he’s not. 

“No.”

Michael blinks at Gavin like an owl and slowly leans back into his chair and lolls his head back, closing his eyes in disbelief.

“Why are you only telling me now?” Michael said, not even looking at Gavin. Gavin thinks this is better. “I mean, it’s Graduation tomorrow! You’re going to miss it?”  This time Michael opens his eyes and glances at him to see Gavin nod. Michael sighs.

 “I just…” Gavin starts, yet he’s not entirely sure how to finish it. “I just don’t think I’m needed here anymore, you know? My parents brought me here to study and it’s already graduation so what’s there to do?” Gavin is trying so hard not to falter. He’s doing surprisingly well.

“Fuck, man.” Michael curses. “I’m your best friend. You could’ve at least given me a heads up to give you a good goodbye party or something!” Michael was shouting by now and standing up and all Gavin could do was clutch his beer harder as Michael says “best friend”. That’s all he’ll ever be.

“I was never really a sentimental person.” He looks at Michael seriously this time. “You know that.” Michael stares back.

“That’s not a very good reason to not fucking tell your best friend about it!” Michael’s face was red from anger. “Jesus fuck, Gav! Are you really gonna leave me in this shit hole of a place? What the fuck?”

“You’ve got Ray.” Gavin shrugged as he spoke nonchalantly all while sipping at his beer. He tried not to look at Michael anymore, knowing that it would make matters worse. “I don’t see the problem.”

“You don’t see the—“ Michael covered his face with his hands. “I thought we were fucking in this together man. I thought we would friends that would help each other in this fucked up place.” Michael clenched his jaw. “But it looks like I’ll be doing it all by myself.” Michael was pissed, Gavin knew. He didn’t look at Michael, but he heard the shuffling of feet and a loud thump and more footsteps walking away and growing fainter.

 Gavin finally looked at Michael’s chair to see it empty, not even his jacket on it and that’s when Gavin began to tear up.

Perhaps this was for the best.

 ---

“Where’s Gavin?”

 Michael didn’t even flinch at the mention of the name as the principal began to call all of their names to come on the stage.

 “He’s not here.” He replied.

 “Not here?” Lindsay said, her face full of dismay. “But he’s your best friend! I mean—“

“I guess he didn’t think we were best friends after all.” Michael said, obviously bitter about the whole thing. Lindsay pursed her lips, as if she knew the whole story even when she didn’t. She secretly slipped her hand between Michael’s fingers and held tight.

 It didn’t feel the same anymore.

 “Gavin David Free.” The principal said. For a moment no one moved. “Gavin David Free.” The principal repeated, as if saying his name twice would magically make Gavin appear, and Michael knew that wasn’t true. He tried it.

Soon after, Mr. Burns appeared on stage and whispered something in the principal’s ear. The principal gave a sad smile before clearing his throat and going on as if nothing happened.

 “Blaine Gibson…”

 Michael exhaled a breath he didn’t know he was holding.

 ---

Gavin stared as the bright lights indicated that his flight was about to leave. He stared down at his feet, still contemplating whether to leave or not.

 “Hey buddy,” Geoff suddenly appeared behind him and placed a hand on his back, making Gavin turn to face him. “You okay?” His eyes were full of concern and Gavin felt guilty. “You don’t have to do this. “ Gavin balled his hands to a fist.

 “No, no.” Gavin assured him. “It’s fine. I swear.” Geoff nodded, not wanting to ask anything which was what made Geoff the best guardian ever.  Gavin felt tears swelling up his eyes and fuck not here. Not now. So he did like all grown up men could do to hide his tears.

He hugged Geoff and buried his head in his coat and sniffled. Geoff took a moment to hug back, obviously shocked at the boy’s display of affection, but he hugged back nonetheless. Gavin wasn’t really sure how long they were standing there, being the center of attention of numerous bystanders obviously confused of why a young English twink was hugging a old man with weird tattoos. But they never questioned it.

 Finally, the announcement was made that Gavin’s flight was giving out its last call to their passengers. Gavin pushed Geoff away gently, wiping his tears from his eyes once more and noticed that Geoff’s eyes were quite glassy. That bastard.

“I’ll miss you, buddy.” Geoff said. “Promise to send me an e-mail every so often okay?” Geoff said, his voice wavering as Gavin nodded.

“Of course.” He turned away, holding his bags tight and headed for his gate.

He never looked back.


	2. ii.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gavin loved Michael. Michael loved Lindsay. Unable to bear the sadness from his one-sided love, Gavin moved to London and has never been happier, especially with his new boyfriend, Ryan. However, when both Ryan and Gavin go to Austin to attend the party of Geoff, Gavin’s guardian, Michael arrives and admits to Gavin that things have not been the same without him and things go downhill from there.

The trip back to Britain wasn’t as depressing as Gavin thought it would be. He decided not to go back to Oxford, however he did call his parents to tell him he was living alone.  They weren’t 100% happy with his decision, but they allowed him nonetheless. They were actually quite thankful that he decided to call.

As Gavin hung up, he felt a sudden relief flow through him. He felt… Free. Which was quite funny, he knew, but that’s the only way he could describe it.

He easily found an apartment soon after. It was in London with a balcony and was already furnished. It was quite nice and Gavin imagined himself living there. Now that owning an apartment was crossed off his list, the only thing now was to get a job.  It was quite hard to find one, but Gavin managed it. Apparently as a barista right across his apartment which was quite convenient. He met a lot of people during his first few weeks in London, like his new boss Jack (who was, oddly enough, from America. How weird) and his fellow barista, Barbara (which was also quite weird because she too came from America.)

“Barbara the Barista!” Barbara happily exclaimed when she introduced herself. “Barbarista!” She winked at Gavin playfully and all Gavin could do was laugh.

“All right, you two.” Jack suddenly appeared in between them and handing their aprons.  “We’ve got a long day ahead of us and I want you two to do your job well.” Both Barbara and Gavin snickered.

“Yes sir!”

 And that was pretty much how Gavin’s first few months in London went.

 He was never happier.

 ---

Gavin had a schedule now, especially since he was almost a year in London. Every morning he’d wake up at 8, then roll in bed until around 9:30 then take a bath and eat breakfast until 10:15 then head over to the coffee shop, which resulted in him getting there by 10:30. It wasn’t a prime time to enter, really, but Jack never reprimanded him. Only rolling his eyes and throwing his apron and saying “Get to work, Jackass.”  To which Gavin responded with “I don’t wanna be your ass” and got him punched quite hardly on the arm by Jack and a giggle from Barbara as she manned the coffee machine. That was how most mornings went.

And Gavin couldn’t wish for it any other way.

“How’s the day so far, Barbarista?” Gavin couldn’t help but call the blonde that, and she seemed to enjoy it.

 “Pretty slow.” She shrugged. “Hey, wanna steal some bagels from the back without’s Jack permission?”

 “That’d be cool as knobs!” Gavin said, with a grin.

 “I heard that!” Jack called from the back and the duo groaned.

 “Party pooper!” They both screamed back in unison as Jack laughed. After that incident, Gavin and Barbara both returned to their respective positions in work, Barbara manning the cashier and Gavin manning the coffee machine. It was silent for a while, with only a few customers and everyone being either busy or bored. Gavin had even resulted to grabbing some of the stirrers and stacking them up.

“Hey, Gavin.”  Barbara suddenly spoke as Gavin bit his lips in concentration to stack up the stirrers.

“Yup?” He called back, still doing his best not to lose his focus. 

“Gavin.” Barbara said once more. “Gavin. Gavin. Gavin. Gavin. Gavin—“

 “SMEGGING SMEG POTS.” Gavin cursed as the stirrers fell to the floor, resulting in Barbara laughing her ass of and Gavin having to pick up the mess. “You cheeky little prick.” Gavin said to Barbara without any anger at all.  “What?”

 “Oh, I wanted to see if you could actually do it with me bothering you.” Barbara grinned and Gavin rolled his eyes.  “That and I wanted to invite you to this party I’m going to tonight.” Gavin stiffened. He hadn’t really gotten out every since he got in London, so he didn’t really know what to say. “Look, Gav,” Barbara said, putting her hand on top of his. “You’ve been in London for what? A year?” Gavin nodded mutely. “Then get out! Have some fun! I promise you, it’ll be worth it.” Gavin laughed inside because an American woman, who was not at all from England or any part of the United Kingdom, was telling him to go out and let loose as if he didn’t live here for the first part of his childhood. Gavin chuckled a bit.

 “Has it really been that long?” Gavin shrugged and Barbara just stared at him. He sighed. “All right, all right.” She clapped with glee.

 “Great!” She squealed. “Let’s head over there together after work and we can go together! It’s gonna be so exciting!” She said, dancing as she served the éclairs to a table. Gavin groaned.

He was totally going to regret this.

 ---

 The party, as Gavin had already assumed beforehand, was pretty boring. Mainly because Barbara did the one thing she said she would not do, and that was ditching him.

 “I’ll be right there the whole time she said.” Gavin muttered bitterly. “It’s gonna be really fun she said.” Gavin sighed, taking a sip of his cup filled with bevs. He sipped a bit more until he saw a man from across the room staring at him. Gavin flushed a bit, staring down at his drink. He lifted his eyes once more to see the man still staring at him. Gavin furrowed his eyebrows and finished his whole drink before heading to the kitchen to get more. Despite the travel, he still felt a pair of eyes staring at him. The problem was, apparently there was no more beer. Worried that he’d look stupid in the kitchen, decided to just get water instead. He sipped once more and saw that the man was smiling fondly at him now. Gavin felt scrutinized under his stare and continued to the room next door.

 “FUCK YEAH!” Gavin jumped at the sudden scream, noticing that there were two people sitting on the couch, playing Halo. He gripped on his cup a bit harder than he should.

“No one can beat me!” One of the people sitting down said, while the other hung his head low and walked away. Gavin could deduct that they were having a competition. As he inspected the room he noticed Barbara watching the whole thing.

 “Is there anyone who can stand up to the great Miles Luna?” He even did a annoying pose that made Gavin roll his eyes and put his drink down.

“I challenge you.” Gavin suddenly said, wanting to punch himself in the stomach now that everyone was looking at him. Miles, apparently, raised his eyebrows and patted the spot next to him.

 “Then show me what you got.”

 ---

In the end, Miles was beaten and was actually a sore loser about it. Gavin smiled smugly as people patted Miles back, who was crying. But he stopped crying soon after, congratulating Gavin for doing a good job. Maybe not a sore loser after all.

 

As Miles walked away, Gavin saw Barbara, who gave Gavin a thumbs in approval. Gavin smiled back, glad that he finally felt that he could have fun. He began to stand before someone pushed him back down.

 “Whoa whoa whoa!” The man said. He had black hair and was wearing a hoodie and a black and white striped shirt inside and… Was he wearing sunglasses? “Where is the champion going?” Gavin raised an eyebrow.

“Excuse me?”

 “This is a tournament! If you win you’re the champion then more people come and challenge you!” The man with sunglasses explained. “What’s your name, man?”

 “Gavin.” Gavin replied weakly, regretting what he got himself into.

“All right.” The man patted Gavin’s back. “WHO HERE WANTS TO CHALLENGE KING GAVIN TO A HALO TOURNAMENT?” The man with sunglasses shouted quite loudly.

“I would.” Gavin turned around to see the man who had been staring at him all night and Gavin stiffened. “Do you mind?” The man said. Up close, Gavin noticed that he had sandy brown hair and was quite big. Really big. Gavin felt intimidated.

 “Uh.. Go ahead.” The man smiled and sat next to Gavin, getting his game on.

“I’m Ryan by the way.” The man said as Gavin said “Why have you been following me?” at the same time. They both blinked at each other as the man just laughed.

 “I don’t know.” Gavin stared at him weirdly. “Probably because you’re pretty cute.” Gavin felt like throwing up. “How about this,” Ryan faced him. “If you win, I am going to ignore you the whole night and you can forget this ever happened.” Gavin nodded, interested. He always liked bets.

 “And if you win?”

 “Then you have to go on a date with me.” Gavin blinked.

 “A date?”

 “Yup.”

“Like, a date date?”

“That’s what I imagine, yes.” Gavin blinked even more.

 “Deal.” Ryan smiled as he shook Gavin’s hand. 

 ---

Ryan won in the end, much to Gavin’s dismay.

 “How the sausage did you do that!” Gavin said, more amazed than annoyed at his loss. “The way you killed those aliens and drove the Ghost I mean, that was top!” Ryan chuckled as they walked down the pavement.

They left the party minutes ago. Gavin then said after the game that he should go home because it was getting quite late. At that moment, Ryan suggested that he go with him, since it appeared that Ryan was going the same direction. Much to the dismay of the people who were waiting for Ryan to battle a challenger once more, he left with Gavin, who bid his goodbyes to Barbara. Since then, Gavin had been talking non-stop about the game and Ryan just chuckled at everything that came out of the Brit’s mouth.

“Just a lot of practice, I suppose.” Ryan said as Gavin smiled.

 “Yeah right.” Gavin chuckled. “You must be the actual Master Chief in an alternate universe or something.” And Ryan stared at him with a smile that was both fond and freaked out.

 “You’re really weird, you know that?” Ryan said as Gavin shrugged nonchalantly.

 “Better than nothing.” And Ryan’s smile might’ve even gotten wider because of that response.

“You, Gavin Free,” Ryan began. “Are one of a kind.” Gavin may have blushed a bit at the statement, but he appreciated it nonetheless. They continued walking in comfortable silence.

“Why are you doing this, Ryan?” Gavin asked.

 “Doing what?” Ryan asked, innocently. Which was totally not the case.

 “This.” Gavin motioned at the space between them as Ryan stared with amusement. “All the flirting and all.”

 “Is that what you call this? Flirting?” Ryan said, shocked and Gavin just glared at him. “Yeah, yeah.” Ryan began chuckling.

“I mean, we just met about an hour ago and we don’t know anything about each other! Aside from the fact that we both love Halo.” Ryan gave Gavin a knowing smile at that. “But next to that… I’m all blank. Why are you doing this?” Gavin asked and Ryan grew silent for a moment, obviously thinking about his answer.

 “There’s just something about you Gavin.” He finally said. “When I first saw you, I don’t know, you looked kind of lonely and I at first thought I only watched you because I felt bad. But then I guess after I played with you I realized it wasn’t that?” Ryan explained, looking as if he himself didn’t believe what was coming out of his mouth because Gavin definitely wasn’t buying it. “I don’t know.” Ryan grew silent once more as Gavin stopped next to a building.

“This is where I live.” Gavin pointed at building. “I guess, this is goodbye?” Ryan frowned. Gavin began to enter when Ryan grabbed his arm, making Gavin turn around and stare at the serious blue eyes.

“I just really have this gut feeling within me,” Ryan said. “That this might turn into something beautiful, you know?” Ryan didn’t let go of Gavin’s arm for a while and just continued to stare. Blue eyes to green. Finally, he let go. Gavin nodded, quite dazed from the contact.

“Good night, Ryan.” Gavin muttered as he closed the door, not waiting for Ryan to even respond.

 ---

When Gavin saw Ryan at the coffee shop the next day, he was absolutely stunned.

 “Are you following me?” Gavin said, having a sudden rush of déjà vu. Ryan had a moment of just staring incredulously before letting out a huge laugh that echoed through out the shop.

“No, not this time.” Ryan smiled genuinely, which made Gavin want to smile back.

“All right, then.” Gavin said. “What’ll you be having?”

 “Just a simple black coffee.” Ryan shrugged as Gavin punched it in. He continuously pressed buttons afterwards, just finding something to pass the time as Ryan stood there. “You know,” Ryan started and Gavin eyed him from the side. “You never stayed true to our bet.” Ryan was leaning forward now, his chin resting on the palm of his hand while his elbow was on the counter.

 “The bet?” Gavin replied dumbly

 “Yeah. The bet.” Ryan chuckled. “The Halo tournament thing. The one in which I said that if I won, you’d go on a date with me.” Ryan pointed out and Gavin visibly stiffened.

“You still remember that?” Gavin gave out an awkward laugh, which really sounded more like a weird squeaky voice.

 “It was only last night, Gavin.” Ryan was smirking now and Gavin wanted to punch his face so bad. “Besides, I wouldn’t forget asking out a pretty face like yours.” Gavin blinked as Ryan put out his wallet to give Gavin the money to pay for the drink. Gavin still hadn’t moved as Barbara called out Ryan’s name from the other side for his drink.

 “So, when are you free?” Ryan asked as he was about to leave the shop.

“Uhhhh,” Gavin mumbled.

“He’s free this Friday, just so you know.” Barbara answered for Gavin and he wanted to strangle her.

 “Cool.” Ryan winked. “I’ll know where to find you ‘till then.” Ryan _fucking winked_.

Before Gavin could even protest, Ryan had walked out of the shop and into the crowd.

 “What the sausage was that!” Gavin exclaimed, rather than asked Barbara. “You can’t just say stuff like that, Barbs! And how do you know my schedule?”

“Gav, you need to get out! It was an actual miracle I even brought you to the part last night, and I don’t regret it! Especially not after meeting a hunk like that dude.” Barbara gestured towards the door Ryan had just exited. “And I’m covering your shift on Friday, so I know.”

 “Geez, Barbs.” Gavin groaned. “I can’t just _go._ I’m going to flipping make a fool out of myself.”   _Like I always do_ Gavin thought within himself, but he didn’t say it out loud because he knew Barbara would reprimand him for even thinking of such a thing.

 

“Relax, Gav! It’s just a date.” Barbara reassured him. “Besides, you have the best person to ever ask for dating advice!”

 “And who might that be?”

 “Me!” Barbara clapped enthusiastically as Gavin rolled his eyes.  He needed new friends, he mentally noted as he greeted the next customer.

 ---

Friday came faster than expected, which made Gavin more nervous than he should be. He tried to think that he didn’t care about the date at all, which was quite ironic because he was currently stressing over what to wear for the day. Ryan had came everyday since the day he reminded Gavin about the date, and he had said that he’d just pick him up outside the coffee shop he worked in.

“I knew you were secretly a girl inside.” Barbara immediately said when Gavin called her for his current crisis.

“Shut up, Barb and just help me.” Gavin said. “Besides, this is partially your fault for even telling him about my day off.” Gavin brought out a random shirt from his closet and checked himself out in the mirror before quickly throwing it away.

“A thank you would’ve sufficed, you know.” Gavin rolled his eyes. “I think you should just wear that black v-neck you have and those black jeans, too. You look really good in those. “ Barbara said, a bit dreamily.

 “Really?” Gavin quietly said.

 “Duh!” Barbara said, as if she was stating the obvious. “I’d totally go down on you, if you weren’t gay as the fourth of July.”

 “Barb!” Gavin said, blushing furiously as she laughed heartily on the other line. 

“Calm down and just wear that.” Barbara was still chuckling.

 “Thanks.” Gavin said.

 “Finally.”

 “Shut up.”

 ---

Gavin was 15 minutes late, mainly because the old lady who lived next door just coincidentally also wanted to go out and she walked quite slow and Gavin, being the nice and kind person he tries to be, didn’t complain at all.

“You know, for a second I thought I got—“ Ryan finally looked up at Gavin and paused for a moment. “Stood up.” Gavin shuffled awkwardly under Ryan’s gaze, whose eyes widened and he even licked his lips.

 “I’m not _that_ kind of guy, Ry.” Gavin said and Ryan quirked an eyebrow.

 “Pet names already?” Ryan was smirking and Gavin cursed himself.

 “Did I say Ry? I meant—“ Gavin was cut off by Ryan’s laugh. It was a nice laugh.

“It’s totally cool, Gavin.” Ryan was still smirking and Gavin tried not to think about the weird feeling in his groin. “Shall we go?”

 ---

It would’ve been easier to detest Ryan if he was a complete asshole.

But of course, like always, the world had other ideas.

 Even before ordering their food in the restaurant, Gavin was already laughing whole-heartedly at Ryan’s stories. Ryan, to be honest, was funny and quite charming really. Every story that he said left Gavin smiling like a stupid and Gavin never felt this happy in such a long time since arriving in London. One particular story, however, left Gavin smiling more than usual and he only noticed after a few minutes that Ryan had not spoken, despite his earlier loquacious attitude. Gavin looked at him and noticed that Ryan had been looking at him intently with a small smile on his face.

“Is something wrong?” Gavin said, bewildered by Ryan’s sudden silence. Ryan merely shook his head.

“No, no.” Ryan reassured him and Gavin nodded, ready to go back to eating his food before Ryan spoke again. “However,” Ryan took a deep breath, as if thinking before he continued. “Is it bad to kiss someone on your first date?”

Gavin may have choked.

 “Because if so, I can totally just bring you to that pastry shop across the street and that might already be the second date.”

 Gavin reached for his glass of water.

“Gavin?” Ryan said, reaching for the other hand that wasn’t struggling to bring the glass to his lips. Gavin didn’t seem to complain about the hand, so Ryan just left it there as he gulped. Finally, as Gavin settled his glass down, he looked at Ryan with cautious eyes.

 “Was that really necessary?” Gavin quietly whispered. Ryan blinked.

 “What?”

 “I….” Gavin looked down at the floor. “I think I need to go.” Gavin stood up and headed for the door, not looking back as he heard his name being called.

 The outside was cold and Gavin hated himself for forgetting his coat inside. He raised his hands to rub his arms, sighing with relief as he felt the warmth. Not long after, he felt something on top of his body and strong hands placing them there. Gavin looked back to see Ryan, having an unreadable expression on his face and Gavin glanced away quickly. He messed up again, like always. He never did anything wrong and the first person who actually showed interest to him he pushed him away. The only way to solve this was to move to Cuba and rename himself and—

 “I don’t understand what I did wrong.” Ryan suddenly said, making Gavin face him. Ryan looked crestfallen and Gavin felt like an _asshole._

“I…” Gavin said, unsure of what to say. “I lived in Austin a long time ago.” Ryan looked at him with such serious eyes as Gavin began to open up. “I used to be in love with my best friend. He was the world to me.” Gavin’s voice became quieter and Ryan said nothing, which urged him on. “But in the end I wasn’t the world to him. He got a girlfriend and completely forgot me and for a while I thought that maybe having him as a best friend be would be better than nothing at all, but it slowly started eating me up and _I couldn’t do it anymore.”_ Gavin squeezed the words out, as if he didn’t want to say it at all. “And I just don’t want to go through that hurtful past again.” Gavin stopped. He waited for Ryan’s reply, but Ryan still didn’t speak. “I understand if you think that it’s such a shallow reason for me not to date you but it’s not shallow for me so I totally get it if you don’t want to—“ At this point, Ryan had gently placed his hand on Gavin’s cheeks, stroking it softly and all Gavin could do was stare back at those blue eyes that had millions of emotions at once, but only one stood up: sadness.

“I’d never want you to go through that again.” Ryan’s voice was uncharacteristically soft. Only then did Gavin realize how close his face was to his and Ryan did the last thing he expected.

 He hugged Gavin.

 “If I had known earlier, I wouldn’t have said those things.” Ryan’s voice was muffled as his head was buried at the crook of Gavin’s neck. For a while, Gavin just stood motionless at Ryan’s affection. Finally, he raised his arms to wrap around Ryan’s bigger body and burying his own face at Ryan’s shoulder before silently sobbing. Ryan shushed him as he cried, Ryan’s hand caressing the back of his head. As Ryan pulled back, Gavin’s glossy eyes looked at Ryan and had a fleeting glance at Ryan’s lips before leaning in for a short peck. Ryan blinked, totally shocked by the sudden action before grinning from ear to ear, and Gavin felt like he was smiling like a loon too.

“We should probably go in and pay our food, right?” Ryan said, sheepishly.

 

Gavin laughed as he placed another peck on his lips.

 ---

_3 years later_  

“Ryan, have you seen my phone?” Gavin’s voiced echoed as he checked underneath the pillows of the bed of their shared bedroom.

“Weren’t you using it last night?” Ryan replied from the living room, as he read the daily newspaper.

“Yeah, but I can’t find it anymore.” Gavin was frustrated now. He had checked all the locations he usually places his phone but none of them were there. As he stood there, his eyebrows furrowed, he didn’t notice Ryan entering the room until he felt a pair of strong arms circled his middle and a nose smelling him.  Gavin smiled as he rubbed circles against the arms thoughtfully.

“Were you looking for this?” Gavin’s eyes looked at Ryan’s hand, which was holding, unsurprisingly, his phone.

“Where’d you find it?” Gavin said, confused.

“In your pockets, you idiot.” Ryan giggled, placing kisses along his neck while his hands hugged him closer.

“Mmmmm.” Gavin hummed as he snuggled closer to Ryan before shaking his head and struggling himself to get away from Ryan’s tight hold. “Ry-bread, you know I’ve got work right now, right?” Gavin said, trying his best to unlatch the arms around him.

“Can’t you call in sick?” Ryan said, still kissing his neck and making Gavin double think about work.

“I called in sick last week. I don’t think Jack’ll like me lounging around and cuddling with you, much to Barbara’s disappointment.” Gavin giggled as he escaped Ryan’s grasp when the older man loosened his hold. Gavin smiled as he held Ryan’s chin and pecked his lips.

“I promise to be back before dinner.” Gavin smiled sheepishly.

“Promise?” Ryan kissed him once more.

“Promise.”

 ---

Gavin still worked in the coffee shop even after almost 4 years of living in England. He would never admit that he was a sentimental sod, but both Barbara and Jack knew that he’d never want to leave them. And they felt the same. The coffee shop had the usuals like Jack and Barbara, however a new addition named Jon.

“Morning, you all!” Gavin greeted with a smile.

“Not sick today, Gav?” Barbara smirked as Gavin rolled his eyes. Barbara might be the biggest fan of Gavin’s relationship with Ryan which irked him so.

“No, Barb. I’m working.” Gavin said as he put on his apron.

“Morning, Gav!” Jon greeted as he made a customer’s cup of coffee.

“Morning, Jon.” Gavin greeted with equal enthusiasm as he opened his phone to check out his e-mail. It was the usual, just random updates about various websites he signed up years ago. However, one e-mail caught his eye.

_To: Gavin Free  
From: Geoff Ramsey_

_Subject: Come back home?_

Gavin blinked. He hadn’t spoke with Geoff for few months and it was weird. Geoff was busy being a father and Gavin with Ryan and his job that they rarely talked nowadays. With his heart stammering, he opened the e-mail and read it.

_Hey, Gav._

_I miss you, buddy. You should write more often. Maybe I should too but let’s not talk about that. Anyways, it’s Griffon and I’s 10 th anniversary soon and we wanted a big reunion party with the whole town since Austin is pretty small and we wanted to invite you since you were a big part of our life once. We really hope you’d come._

_Hoping to hear you soon,_

_Geoff x_

Gavin let out a breath he hadn’t known he had held. He closed his eyes and thought about it. Going back to Austin? It sounded like a great plan. He could see Geoff and everyone in town like Mr. Burns and—

_Michael._

Gavin’s eyes shot open. Even after all these years just thinking of the name made him shiver and cringe. He would never let go of Michael, would he? But he had done well so far. He had Jon and Barbara and Jack and… _Ryan._

That’s it. He’ll bring Ryan with him. It was going to be a fun vacation and Ryan would finally know more about him and it’d be a big step in their relationship. Gavin smiled as he clicked ‘reply’ and began typing.

 

_Hey Geoff!_

_So great to hear from you, really. I missed you too. 10 th anniversary, you say? Wow you’re growing old, man. Watch out for those white hairs and all. I’d love to attend the party! I’m sure it’ll be a blast. However, is it fine if I bring my boyfriend along? I’m sure he’d love to meet you. _

_Love,_

_Gav_

Gavin smiled as he shut off his phone and began to take orders, thinking on how Ryan would be so ecstatic to hear the news.

 ---

“Austin?” Ryan’s face was shocked, but not all that mad.

“Y-Yeah.” Gavin replied. “My friend Geoff is inviting me to his 10th year anniversary with his wife and he’s hosting a really great party and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me..?” Gavin’s voice slowly started sounding unsure as he continued to speak. Ryan looked up at him from where he sat on the sofa and sighed.

“I’d love to go, Gav.” Ryan said with a fond smile and Gavin breathed out a sigh of relief “But… Are you ready?”

“Ready? For what?”  Gavin said, trying to sound convincing but it didn’t work with Ryan. Ryan always saw behind it.

“For him. For Michael.” Gavin cringed at the name and felt horrible when he saw the hurt look on Ryan’s face. Ryan sighed as he approached Gavin and hugged him. “We don’t have to if you can’t, Gav.” Gavin closed his eyes, just listening to Ryan’s heartbeat and his soft breaths.

“No.” Ryan pushed him back a bit to stare at Gavin’s face.

“No?” Ryan’s voice was confused.

“No.” Gavin stared dead on at Ryan. “I’m over him. Besides, I have you.” Ryan smiled as he leaned down and kissed Gavin lovingly. He pulled away moments after, making Gavin whimper, and he chuckled.

“Austin it is, then.”

 ---

 When Gavin stepped foot on Austin, it was hotter than he last remembered. The sun was shining above them as he held Ryan’s hand while walking towards their luggage. They were only staying for a week, no more no less, especially since Ryan also had work to go to back in England. Nonetheless, Gavin was excited to be home, especially when Geoff greeted him with a weird moustache and a sign holding up “For my idiot brit (and his boyfriend)”

“Geoff!” Gavin cried as he wrapped his arms around Geoff’s neck for a hug.

“Gav!” Geoff exclaimed with equal eagerness as he hugged back the young lad. “Did you get even thinner?” Geoff joked, which earned him a small punch from Gavin.

“Don’t be a twat. What’s up with the weird moustache?”

“I’m trying to make it look like a 70s porno.” Geoff explained, twirling it like a villain from those cartoons you see when you were young. “What’d you think?”

“It looks horrible.” Gavin commented. “I love it.” Which made both of them laugh. “Oh right, this is Ryan. My boyfriend.” Gavin gestured towards Ryan as Ryan held out a hand for a shake.

“Pleasure to meet you, Mr. Ramsey.” Ryan said, smiling.

“Please call me Geoff.” Geoff grinned as he shook his hand. “So you’re the lucky guy with Gavin, huh? You’re quite the looker.” Geoff wolf whistled for emphasis, which made Gavin blush like crazy.

“Geoff please.” Gavin said, obviously embarrassed.

“Don’t worry, Gavin’s a keeper. I’m sure of it.” Geoff winked as he walked to his car.

“I know.” Ryan replied, even if Geoff had already left for them to follow, as he stared at Gavin.  Gavin stared back and smiled before tiptoeing for a kiss.

\---

The hotel room was more spacious than Gavin expected. He originally wanted to go back to Geoff’s house for old time’s sake, but he realized that he wasn’t the only one going. That he had someone who was going with him. It all seemed kind of surreal, to be honest.

“The party’s on the day before you leave, okay.” Geoff said, as he carried their bags towards their room. “It’s actually going to be in the bar just right across this hotel, so if you guys are late I won’t accept any excuses.” As he finished, he was able to bring the last of their luggage in.

“Thanks, Geoff.”  Gavin smiled and Geoff patted him.

“No problem, Gav.” Geoff took a moment and just stared at Gavin for a while longer before hugging him again.

“I really did miss you, Gav.” Gavin sighed and hugged Geoff closer.

“I missed you too.”

“Griffon and I are having dinner at our place with some people tomorrow night. You in?” Geoff said, smiling.

“Of course I am!” Gavin replied. “I can’t wait to see everyone, to be honest.”

“Yeah. I’m pretty sure everyone didn’t forget you. Especially how big that nose is.”

“Geoff!"

After a few goodbyes and more embarrassing comments from Geoff (and a few laughs from Ryan, that bastard), Geoff finally took off and left Gavin and Ryan to their hotel rooms.

“That was… Eventful.” Ryan commented as he kissed Gavin’s temple.

“That’s Geoff for you.” Gavin smiled as Ryan hugged Gavin’s middle and carried him towards the bed.

“Ryan— What— Oof.” Gavin said as he was dropped down onto the bed. He looked up at Ryan, who had a smirk on his face before he laid down next to Gavin and cuddled next to him.

“It’s been a while since we’ve done this.” Ryan murmured as he inhaled Gavin from the crook of his neck.

“What? Travel overseas? I think it’s our first time, Ryan.” Ryan rolled his eyes.

“No I meant—“ Ryan snuggled closer to Gavin. “Just laid in bed and cuddled. It’s been a while.” Gavin smiled.

“It has, hasn’t it?” Gavin shifted his position and faced Ryan to wrap his arms around his waist, making him the little spoon.  After a while, it was silent. Gavin smiled as he continued to snuggle closer to Ryan and Ryan sighed contentedly.

“I love you, Gav.” Gavin’s smile might’ve grown bigger.

“I love you too, Ryan.”

 ---

The dinner was an eventful time. Gavin was had just arrived at Geoff’s house around 10 minutes ago and immediately was bombarded with all of his old friends. Mr. Burns was there, all smiles and greetings and Gavin felt special. He felt happy. He conversed with everyone, catching up and apologizing for his sudden leave and introducing everyone to Ryan, who was happy to see Gavin’s friends.

“Wow, Gavin. You’ve won the jackpot.” Mr. Burns chuckled as Gavin blushed furiously when Ryan went away to get drinks for them

“Mr. Burns— “

“Gavin, please,” Mr. Burns raised a hand. “Just call me Burnie. I haven’t been teaching for years.” Gavin blinked.

“B-Burnie.” It felt weird to say it.

“Atta, boy.” Mr. Burns— Burnie— smiled as he patted his back. “Oh you know, Michael’s coming tonight.” Gavin froze. “I’m sure he’ll be happy that you’re back.” Gavin had almost forgotten about Michael. Instantly, he started to stress and worry and all.

“Do you know when he’s coming?” Gavin couldn’t help but ask, worried, but Burnie didn’t seem to mind.

“I think I saw him in the car park earlier, actually.” Gavin paled.

“O-Oh.” Gavin nodded absently before walking away. “I have to go Burnie, Bye!” Burnie seemed to nod as Gavin walked towards Ryan, who held to cups and a confused expression as Gavin approached him.

“Gav? What’s up?” Ryan sounded concerned

“We gotta go.” Gavin got his cup and held Ryan’s free hand, rushing before they ended up meeting—

“You ignoring me, Gav?” Gavin stiffened. It must’ve been obvious because Ryan gripped his hand tightly, a silent “Are you okay?” and Gavin was nodding. Gavin turned around and all his emotions and horrible memories came flashing back.

Michael looked the same.  Other than the obvious signs of aging like the lines by his sides and his eye bags, he looked the same and Gavin swore he wasn’t breathing.  Michael looked horrible, yet Gavin still couldn’t keep his eyes away.

“M-Michael.” Gavin croaked.

“Gavin.” Michael said, monotonous. Ryan must’ve sense the whole tension as he placed a reassuring arm around Gavin’s waist, pulling him close to Ryan. Michael glanced at the hand around the waist and looked at Ryan.

“Who are you?” Michael squinted his eyes, as Ryan straightened his back.

“I’m Ryan.” Ryan said. “Gavin’s _boyfriend.”_ Michael’s eyes widened and he stared at Gavin and then at Ryan and then back at Ryan.

“B-Boyfriend?” Michael said, almost unbelievably. “You… You didn’t tell me you were—“

“I didn’t think it was important.” Gavin cut him off; deciding that looking at the floor was way better than staring at Michael straight into his eyes. This must’ve made Michael furious because he suddenly balled his fists and glared at Gavin.

“Yeah, well there’s a whole lot of _other_ _shit_ that you didn’t think were important.” Michael sneered, making Gavin flinch slightly. “You _fucking left_ , Gav!  You fucking left me and it might have meant nothing to you but _not for me._ ” Michael was screaming at this point and people started to come over and watch. Even Geoff had noticed the commotion.

“Michael, not here—“ Gavin pleaded but it was useless.

“Not here? What? You’re gonna _run away from this like you ran away from me?”_ Michael was so furious, his whole face red and Gavin felt so close to crying. “Fuck you, Gavin—“

“Hey!” Ryan suddenly stood in front of him, glaring back at Michael. “You don’t talk to my boyfriend like that.” Gavin felt a sudden surge of relief at the sound and feeling of Ryan next to him. Michael faltered a bit, probably disgusted by the fact that Gavin even has a boyfriend, but he stood his ground.

“I don’t care if he’s your boyfriend! He is my _fucking best friend_ who left me as if it didn’t mean a thing! I can talk to him however I like!”

“I’m afraid I can’t let you.” Ryan had his fists balled as well. Ryan wasn’t one to resort to violence, so Gavin was so shocked to see Ryan so fazed by this.

“Gentlemen, please.” Geoff reprimanded as he approached the both of them. “This is my dinner. All I’m asking is that you both act civil about this. _Please._ ” Ryan and Michael continued to glare at each other as Geoff pushed them apart from one another, but they both calmed down a bit.

“Let’s go, Gavin.” Ryan said, leading Gavin away from Michael. Gavin continued to walk away, not before glancing behind him to see a devastated Michael.

 --- 

“Well that was an utter disaster.” Was the first thing Ryan said the moment they arrived back inside their hotel room. Gavin had already sat on their bed and took off his shoes and his socks, feeling sore all over his body even though he hadn’t even danced that much or drunk a single bottle.

“I’m… So sorry, Ry.” Gavin’s voice was so soft that Ryan shouldn’t have heard it. But Ryan, being Ryan, heard it loud and clear as he gave a sigh and sat next to Gavin on the bed.

“It’s not your fault.” Ryan placed an arm around Gavin’s shoulders, allowing the thinner man to lean on his shoulder. He rubbed Gavin’s arm soothingly as he cooed the younger man. Soon enough, Gavin started sobbing and Ryan felt something wet on his shoulder. He placed his chin on top of Gavin’s head and waited for the younger man to calm down. It took a while, but finally after minutes of sobs and wails, Gavin stopped crying and backed away to wipe the tears.

“You okay?” Ryan said, pushing the part of Gavin’s hair that was covering his face. Gavin nodded. “I’m gonna take a shower.” Gavin blinked at him. “Wanna join me?” Gavin stared at the older man before giggling like crazy and running to the bathroom. “What the—“ Ryan tried chasing the boy to the shower, that is until he saw that Gavin’s clothes were scattered all around the bathroom floor. Ryan smirked.

“You coming in?” Gavin said and Ryan laughed. He was happy that Gavin felt better.

 ---

Gavin slept peacefully that night. With Ryan by his side, he felt safe and warm and _happy._ It was lovely. Ryan was lovely. Gavin was just so happy and nothing could go wrong—

Someone was knocking on the door.

Gavin had woken up almost instantly after the first few knocks. Ryan was kind of a heavy sleeper, so as Gavin stood up to open it Ryan was still breathing heavily from sleep. Gavin tiptoed towards the door to open it.

“We don’t need room service, thank y—“

“People usually thank me afterwards.” Gavin’s eyes shot up to see a smiling Michael, his eyes red and his clothes properly disheveled. Gavin instantly closed the door a bit more, making Michael’s smile falter.

“Look, Gav,” Michael started. “I’m so sorry about last night, okay? I was drunk and I shouldn’t have handled it like that. Let me make it up to you, okay?” Gavin saw how sincere Michael was and sighed in defeat

"How did you even find us?" Gavin said, still wary of the whole situation.

"I may have threatened Geoff a bit." Michael admitted. "So, please?" Gavin stared at Michael.

“Okay.” Gavin opened the door and stepped out the room to speak to Michael privately. 

“Breakfast?” Michael smiled sheepishly and for the first time through out the conversation, Gavin smiled.

 ---

Being with Michael was actually better than Gavin expected. It felt like old times. Like Gavin hadn’t left Michael. Like Michael hadn’t got mad at Gavin. As if everything was normal.

 “So, you got a boyfriend now, huh?” Michael suddenly grew serious as he ate his pancakes. Gavin sipped on his Red Bull before putting it down and nodding.

“Yup. His name’s Ryan.”

“I know.”

 “What?” Gavin choked. How?

“Yeah. He told me. Last night.” Oh.

“Oh.” Michael laughed.

 “How eloquent of you, Gavin.” Gavin rolled his eyes.

 “Shut up.”

For a while, they both ate in silence. Michael cutting his pancakes and bacon while Gavin ate his eggs. Gavin wondered if he should say something. Anything. It began to get awkward and Gavin just thought of the first thing in his mind.

“How are you and Lindsay?” Michael stiffened as Gavin asked. Gavin noticed this and immediately thought that he had said something bad.

 “Lindsay’s not here anymore.” Gavin blinked before he covered his mouth with his face.

“Oh my god, Michael. I’m so sorry. Was it painful or—“

“What?” Michael looked up, before he gave a face of understanding and laughed. “You idiot, she’s not dead!”

 “… Then why did you make me think that, you prick?” Gavin laughed along.

“Yeah, well,” Michael said. “ She left a few years back.” Michael gloomily poked at his leftover pancakes. “I thought I loved her, you know? Then after you left…” Michael looked up at Gavin seriously. “It just didn’t feel the same.” Michael continued to stare at Gavin, which made the Brit shift a bit uncomfortably.

“It’s getting a bit late isn’t it, Michael?” Gavin suddenly said, looking at his wrist only to find it without a watch. “Ryan would probably be looking for me by now.” Gavin was standing up as he noticed Michael staring back at his pancakes. He was ready to head out, before he heard Michael.

 “When will I see you again?” Gavin closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

 “Maybe we could get coffee sometime?” Gavin looked up and Michael was looking back. Michael smiled.

 "I’d like that.”

 ---

Gavin wasn’t gone for too long, however when he arrived Ryan was in the hotel room, looking worried. Ryan looked up and relief flooded his face.

“Where were you?” Ryan stood up to hug Gavin. “I was worried sick.” Gavin smiled as he hugged back.

“I just had breakfast.” Gavin explained.

“All by yourself?” Ryan teased with a smirk.

“No, just with Michael.” Gavin said, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. Ryan froze and looked back at Gavin.

“Michael?” Ryan asked with a raised eyebrow. Gavin rolled his eyes as he unlatched himself from Ryan and walked towards his bag to get his clothes for changing.

“Yeah, with Michael. He just wanted to say sorry about last night and all.”   Gavin reassured Ryan.

“I don’t know.” Ryan said with dismay. “He didn’t say sorry to me.” Ryan appeared behind Gavin and Gavin giggled before turning around to kiss the older man on the nose.

“Don’t be jealous, Ry.” Gavin was teasing this time as Ryan huffed as he muttered something that sounded akin to “’m not jealous.” Which earned him a giggle from Gavin before jumping and kissing Ryan square on the mouth.

“You know I only love you.” Gavin whispered as Ryan carried him and dropped him on the bed, before hovering on top of him.

“I know.” 


End file.
